In his book, the Four Agreements, Don Miguel Ruiz provides insight into how to make our lives better, more fulfilled and manageable on a day-to-day basis.
How can following these simple steps be so transformational when we start to utilise them in our lives? it’s because, they are make us pay attention to the things we do and how we do them. The simplest things often are the hardest to follow but when we understand the meanings, we can strive to live by them.
These Four Agreements are:
1. Be impeccable with your word
2. Don’t take anything personally
3. Don’t make assumptions
4. Always do your best
In each agreement, the author provides anecdotes and precious information on how we can conduct ourselves to make the world we see a better place – for us, our families, our friends, our colleagues and society at large.
Always doing our best is something which we hear when we’re at school, in the work-place, going about our day to day activities but what does this mean to you and I and what can we do to ensure we are doing our best and bringing the best of us to any given situation?
It’s about questioning ourselves and asking those tough questions – what is my agenda, is what I am doing aligned to my moral principles or are the words I am using right for me and the greater good?
Be in the present moment
Many times, we are multi-tasking which means we are never truly doing one thing to our best focus, attention, concentration and with a whole heart. When in a meeting, we’re checking mails, sending messages and letting the mind roam to the next thing on the list.
By stopping the “noise” and focusing for the duration of the task, activity, meeting, by actively listening, our minds will learn to focus, learn to be in the here and now.
Give what you’re willing to get out
When in any given situation, give your best shot, put in the effort, time and energy to get out what you desire. If you want a decision to go your way, find out what the decision makers want, if you want to do well in the marathon, research what needs to be done, if you want to wow your family with the evening meal, put in all the time it requires, with love and passion.
People depend on you
In any given situation, there is someone around us who is depending on us doing our best – family, colleagues, staff members, pedestrians, society, workers, co-drivers on the road and if we’re not doing your best in any given situation, then they may suffer. People are intuitive and feel when someone is not “into” something and they then may become impacted and behave accordingly.
By doing our best and demonstrating these behaviors to others, they will become inspired by these qualities and mirror the behaviors – we will become the coach, teacher and mentor and inspire others just by the way we behave.
It’s not all about results
Being present doesn’t mean that the outcomes will always go our way – it’s about the contribution to ensure the right outcome for the situation is achieved. Each event presents a learning experience, so whether our team lost in a sporting event or someone took over, there is a lesson being presented to us to learn from.
When we’re down, our best will be down
We all have bad days; we wake up and wonder how we will get through the day. We feel we cannot face certain people or there is a bully who may make the day bad. It’s on these days when we need to tap into the deepest part of ourselves and find ways to bring the best out.
Ten years ago, I attended the Tony Robbins – Unleash the Power within and he talked about our physiology and it’s impact on our minds – “motion for emotion” is still one of my favourite lines. The way we stand, our posture can impact our mind, so stand tall, remember to breathe and walk your best walk.
What is our story
We are always sending ourselves messages, the 60,000 to 80,000 thoughts we have a day are making us think the way we think, be the way we are. These messages, the stories and behaviors make us who we are. This is where the power of positive affirmations can help – by telling ourselves great things about our qualities, strengths and our feelings, we become those thoughts and messages – so positive message make us positive people.
Louise Hay is a pioneer in the field of positive affirmations and has written much on this subject. Take your affirmation, bring it into the present moment and whatever you want to be, state the intention and believe what you say.
Recognize your best
Be aware of how present you are in any given situation, rate it on a scale of 1 to 10. For any given situation, where do you want to be on the scale and is there a gap.
Realize that if you’re not your best, the result may be impacted – in these situations, be gentle on yourself and ask why you were not fully there and doing your best and how will you change that for next time.
Each moment, each hour and each day is a new opportunity for us to put in our best into the things we do, the conversations we have and how we go about our daily lives so it’s never too late to be the best you are.
Monica Mahi Mathijs is a Meditation Teacher, Lifestyle Consultant and Management Consultant having worked in London and Dubai for the last fifteen years.
References Used:
The Four Agreements is written by Don Ruiz Miguel and forms an inspiration for this article.
Louise Hay is a writer of many self-development and life changing books.
Tony Robbins is a motivational coach offering books, courses and programs globally.